Imagine feeling like you belong in your life.
When you believe in yourself and know you deserve to be successful and feel fulfilled, you are better able to make clear choices about your career and make a huge contribution through your work.
You’re not just smiling on the outside.
But on the inside too.
Yet, right now, chronic self-doubt (aka imposter syndrome, or the fraud factor) and constant self-criticism have got you playing small, people pleasing, and hiding your shine.
When imposter syndrome takes hold…
Does this sound familiar?
- You speak out in a meeting but afterwards your inner critic picks it to death, telling you that you’ve made a fool of yourself and “how could you ever think they’d take you seriously“
- You’re ready to hit send on a powerful post when a knot comes in your stomach and you start to second guess everything you’ve written…. “what will they think?“
- You wake at 4am obsessing over all the ways in which you’ve failed and are not good enough
- You are regularly convinced that your colleagues and clients are only humouring you and will soon find out that you’re nothing special
- When you get good feedback you feel even more of a fraud
Sometimes imposter syndrome shows up as vague but uncomfortable feelings, without any apparent cause or focus.
Wanting to zone out or eat all day. Fighting yourself to get anything done.
The inner critic is typically the mouthpiece for this whole pattern.
More often than not, though, imposter syndrome is not just a voice it’s a whole body experience of feeling anxious, bad and wrong. An experience you have to push through again and again.
To cure the ‘fraud factor’, you’ve probably tried the usual:
mindset work
affirmations
“thinking positive”
etc. etc.
but still secretly feel like you’re a fraud and struggle with negative inner voices.
This non-stop battle with imposter syndrome is like constantly walking into a headwind.
You want a fulfilling business or career. You want to make a difference, if only you could stop playing small, doubting your every move and beating yourself up over every. little. thing.
Like you, I used to experience this a lot.
My inner critic used to keep me paralysed, head down, and afraid of speaking up. And if anything did go wrong, or god forbid I made a mistake, it would take me weeks to find my equilibrium again.
I struggled to move forward with my website, with marketing, with showing up every day in my business. I did great work with clients, but procrastinated and shrank back from making myself more visible “out there”. And then beat myself up about that too.
Like you, I tried positive thinking and affirmations. I read self-help books. I took courses and I got coached. Like you’ve probably done, I told my inner critic to go away and shut up.
None of it worked for longer than a few hours.
That all changed for me when I started to work on my relationship with myself in a RADICALLY different way.
And it can change for you too.
Overcome chronic self-doubt, feel radiantly confident, & love life again
I say ‘again’ because you weren’t born beating yourself up, and second guessing yourself.
This constant merry-go-round of imposter syndrome, harsh self criticism, self-sabotage, and negative thinking is painful, I know. But there is an alternative.
There is hope.…
It is important to know…
Popular culture gets a lot wrong about dealing with the inner critic
The part that’s critical & the part that’s feeling criticised & the part that wants it all to stop – they’re all fighting and you’re caught in the crossfire.
That’s a tangled mess that most people simply cannot untangle for themselves, by themselves, especially when received wisdom is to ignore and push down the difficult parts, and focus only on the positive.
This is the wrong advice and is just another example of more of the same conflict.
The inner critic can become an ally rather than an enemy
In order to transform the inner critic & overcome its undermining voice, a radically different approach is needed. An approach that recognises that ALL parts of you come with positive intentions and, which brings love and compassion to ALL parts of you.
(Without this, inner peace is impossible.)
At the same time, you need a safe enough space to do this work in making the inner critic your ally, rather than your enemy. It’s harsh voice can be overpowering, so no wonder it can be tough to work with alone.
Mindset is only part of the story, deeper work is needed
Imposter syndrome is a holistic issue. It’s not just about how you think, it’s about the systems, both internal and external.
By going beyond mindset to access bodily-felt wisdom about your situations, you go direct to the source of the issue.
As a result, you not only end the nightmare of negative thinking, you free up boundless energy and resources.
Because you’re not having to work so hard to just get through the day.
Turn your ‘fraud factor’ headwind into a confidence tailwind
Introducing…
Confidence Rising
A 16 week experiential coaching programme for women who are beyond ready to conquer imposter syndrome, feel confident to take on the world, and be at peace with themselves
What is “Confidence Rising”?
(How can you overcome imposter syndrome, quiet the inner critic, and develop lasting confidence?)
Confidence Rising is an experiential, confidential confidence coaching course delivered via 8 fortnightly, live, one-to-one sessions. It blends proven coaching techniques with Inner Relationship Focusing practices and concepts to help you:
- Claim your personal power so you can take action in order to build a brilliant career, rock your business, and create a life with meaning and heart
- Develop the tools and grounding to quickly tame that critical inner voice
- Make significant shifts in your confidence, feeling at home with yourself, and your ability to easily stand up and speak up for the things that matter to you
- At last! – know deep down that you can trust yourself (both your brilliance and your messy humanity) even when mistakes happen, or you have a tough day, or life throws you a curve ball
- Show up at your best in work, and out, and
- Turn the self doubt/inner critic headwind into a confidence tailwind
Break through to lasting confidence and self-belief
(What results can the right person expect?)
- A dramatic decrease in the amount of negative self-talk, self-criticism and beating yourself up (right from the start)
- The relief of knowing that you don’t have to fight yourself to get anything done, that you’re on your own side
- Significant positive shifts in confidence, and your ability to easily stand up and speak up for the things that matter to you
- To feel more resilient, so even when you make a mistake, or you have a tough day, you can maintain your balance and positivity
- More self-belief, higher self-esteem, and self-trust
- Transferable skills in dealing with negative thoughts, regulating challenging emotions. As well, get in touch with the wisdom that lies beneath them. (These are skills for life, not just for this programme!)
- More ease in decision-making, more following through on actions and goals
- Knowing that you are enough (which you are!)
- Finding it easier to get and stay focused on what you need to achieve
Read on to discover how “Confidence Rising” offers a radically different approach to building self-belief
Or, if you’re ready to get started… jump to price and signup…
“Confidence Rising”: a Radically Different Process for Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
This is a one-to-one, personal coaching experience. So we will be working with how imposter syndrome and chronic patterns show up for you personally. And we’ll explore the specifics of what’s needed to overcome it, for you.
This is no “cookie-cutter” d-i-y course with a few pointers and questionnaires. Instead, it’s an experiential, deep-dive, and transformative process.
As an experienced professional coach and embodiment teacher (with a background in person-centred therapy), it’s important to me that you are at the heart of this process.
At the same time, there are several themes that, from my experience, I know we need to explore to create the shifts from self-doubt to self-trust. And so you can go from beating yourself up to self-compassion and self-confidence.
Through focusing on these core themes this programme helps untangle and transform the imposter syndrome pattern.
1. Radical acceptance (instead of endlessly repeating the same old battle with yourself)
You want to feel more in control of your inner world. The paradox is: the more you can accept whatever arises in you, the more your life will flow in the direction of self-trust, growth and fulfillment.
- Learn a simple change of language to create immediate relief from the pain of the Inner Critic
- Discover how “inner bias” drives the cycle of negativity and self-criticism and what to do instead.
- Feel supported and empowered to engage with and transform difficult thoughts and feelings through creating inner safe havens.
- Discover how the bad feelings themselves can be used to support a positive shift (and in fact are key to this)
- Uncover the truth of what your critical inner voice wants for you – the treasure at its heart. You may be surprised at how this connects to your life-purpose
- Be amazed and heartened at discovering the positive intent that lies behind seemingly negative thoughts and feelings
“What you have despised as a thorn, opens into a rose”
Rumi
2. Release unhelpful patterns through working with and through the body – where issues are concretely held
With imposter syndrome, you feel both criticised by yourself, and critical of yourself at the same time. This makes more sense when you realise that you are not a single “I” but an internal system of intersecting partial selves. (Thoughts are only one aspect of this system.)
- Develop skills in listening through your wise body to both the individual parts and the whole system – so the whole pattern can shift and be released
- Discover the power of using your whole self (not just your mind) for self-reflection, decision-making, and direction-finding
- Gently and respectfully uncover the issues embedded beneath the whirling thoughts and repetitive patterns of chronic self-doubt, perfectionism, and procrastination …your body knows the answer
- Learn how to ground and support yourself through your body and its lived experience.
- Understand how your inner space can become a haven of peace without disconnecting from life or disregarding your feelings.
- Shift your relationship with yourself from one of feeling sabotaged and hounded, to compassion and respect.
“The bad feeling is the body knowing and pushing towards what good would be”
Dr Gene Gendlin
3. Embody your Sovereign Self – your inner guidance and leadership system
- Shift into a more empowered and confident space with the vibrant compassion of your Sovereign-Self
- Discover how to trust (and read) your inner compass – even when it shows up with difficult stuff – instead of needing to be constantly vigilant against negative thoughts and feelings
- Learn about and experience self-empathy and its power to heal and transform
- Learn how to invite action steps that emerge from consideration of the whole system – a powerful way of working with complex issues
- More easily take action that feels good
- Embrace “progress instead of perfect”
- Develop a sense of solid, embodied presence that is core to self-confidence and resilience
- Feel at home in your own skin
“Let me listen to me and not them”
Gertrude Stein
Working together to build self-belief
The Confidence Rising coaching programme is confidential & one-to-one
We meet 8 times over video conferencing or telephone, more or less fortnightly. Session 1 lasts 90 minutes and sessions 2-8 last around 60 minutes
(NB There is some flexibility for holidays etc.)
This transformative coaching programme is a blend of:
- Powerfully effective, embodied coaching using techniques from Inner Relationship Focusing (creating inner shifts),
- Plus traditional outcome-oriented coaching (putting change into place in the real world), and
- Guidance on how to apply the techniques for yourself as a self-help tool going forward (teaching and embedding the approach as a skill for life).
You will be encouraged to try out these techniques and practices by yourself between sessions, supported by handouts and audios. Depending on what’s required, some of these will be bespoke to you.
You’ll also have access to email and DM support (via LinkedIn) during office hours for the duration of the programme.
I’m in! (jump to price and signup)…
“Confidence Rising” is a good fit for you if you are…
- at a career crossroads, or planning career change, but finding your inner critic stops you from making the changes you want. You’re in need of confidence and self-belief to navigate new directions
- a woman on a mission, but you feel like you’re always fighting yourself. You struggle to stand up & speak up for your work (you do it, but it’s exhausting)
- a senior professional who has achieved a lot, climbed the ladder, but feels worn down by perfectionism, second-guessing yourself, and feeling like you’re a fraud at work.
- a business woman or practitioner who wants to make a positive difference in the world. But, you know you’re not having the impact you could have if you didn’t tend to play safe, hide your shine, and lose your equilibrium – and therefore your momentum – whenever anything goes wrong
- a corporate professional dealing with redundancy and its aftermath and finding your confidence has taken a nose-dive
…even though, you have evidence from qualifications, feedback, testimonials, etc that you are good at what you do; …even though colleagues and clients tell you they value your work
In addition…
- You’re not a beginner at personal development. For example you may have previously worked on your mindset, done affirmations, read self-help books, etc etc …but your critical inner voices are still going strong
- You are so DONE with holding back, beating yourself up, and that feeling that you can’t trust yourself. You are ready for change – both in how you approach this issue and in actually shifting it.
And who is this not suitable for?
Someone who is not sure where to go next in their career and for whom lack of clarity is more of an issue than confidence. You’d probably benefit more from Career Compass Coaching. If you’re not sure what’s needed, please do get in touch for an informal chat.
Someone who’s just looking for mindset work. Although mind shifts will certainly be part of this, my approach to defeating imposter syndrome is grounded in the wisdom of the body. I’ll be guiding you in how to access this resource.
Someone who is at the beginning of their personal development journey. My approach can still help, but a slower pace would probably suit you better. Please contact me to discuss.
If you’re currently in crisis, emotionally, physically, or financially, or, if you are suffering from complex trauma or PTSD, this course is not suitable for you.
Some of the other topics/themes we’ll cover to help you overcome imposter syndrome and break-through to lasting confidence:
- Reviewing what is: How does imposter syndrome, and the inner critic, show up for you in your life and work. What is its function in your life? What do you want instead and why? Usually we begin here, though we will revisit this over the course of the programme.
- You’ll learn how to engage with your inner critic and other manifestations of imposter syndrome in a contained, facilitative, and transformative way (rather than just arguing with them, or surrendering to them)
- You’ll discover how a simple change in language can switch off spirals of negative thoughts and self-doubt, from day 1
- We’ll redefine what it means to be “enough”, breaking the cycle of perfectionism and “not good enough”
- You’ll learn how to access the wisdom locked up in patterns like the Inner Critic (this wisdom is highly relevant for your life purpose)
- You will discover and develop your “Sovereign-self”. This aspect of self is vital for confidence and empowerment. It generates a sense of belonging to yourself, and in the world.
- We’ll unpack the unhelpful false beliefs that drive self-doubt and self-criticism, enabling them to be released from the body so you can live free from crippling doubt and beating yourself up.
- I’ll help you develop self-empathy, strengthening your ability to be in peaceful, positive relationship with yourself, and with others (no more being a pushover)
- We’ll look at how self-sabotage feeds negativity, identify its underlying drivers (what’s really going on) and you’ll learn how to sidestep that loop
- We’ll use embodied-visioning techniques to help you experiment with who you would be without the constant self criticism and to help you step into that “future-you” in the present.
- Action and accountability – I will coach you to identify emergent action steps, making sure inner shifts are translating into real world change.
What does the “Confidence Rising” coaching programme cost?
This intensive and transformative programme will deliver significant improvements in confidence and self-belief. Are you ready to step out of that headwind and go forward with ease and va-va-voom?
Programme fee: £800 (if using single payment on booking)
Or, you can spread the fee via 4 payments of £200. (One on booking and the remainder 4, 8, and 12 weeks into the programme).
I will invoice you once we have agreed a start date. Once you’ve confirmed your place I’ll send you your exclusive copy of my “Creating Space for Positive Change” workbook (see image).
Just to reiterate how it works:
- We work together for 8 weekly or fortnightly sessions either by telephone or video conferencing (or a mixture) depending on your preference
- Session 1 will be about 90 minutes, the remaining 7 sessions will be 60 minutes. (NB if you have e.g. a holiday booked, the overall time can be extended up to 2 additional weeks.)
- You receive pdf handouts and audios to support you in practicing between sessions. These are for your personal use only.
- You will have access to me for questions and support via email or DM during office hours (9am-6pm Mon-Sat) for the duration of the programme.
- Once you’ve completed any of my programmes, should you want further occasional support, you’ll be able to book one-of additional coaching or guided focusing sessions, at a reduced rate.
Get started on overcoming imposter syndrome
Got questions? Drop me a message using the form below…
Header Image by Nicolas Postiglioni on Pexels